Blegh. It's been quite some time since I posted an angsty update, so prepare yourself.
The last few weeks have been especially hard to handle. Ever since I returned from Iceland I have just been seemingly unable to complete anything. I'm worried my grades are going to reflect this when school gets out in a month. For instance, I had an assignment due last Monday, and I did the second half incorrectly, so I asked the professor if I could redo it, he said yes, but it's been six days and I still haven't been able to complete it, even after I spent three hours the other day staring intermittently at the reading and the blank word doc where my answers should have gone. I don't even have the willingness to edit that last sentence so that it isn't a run on. AHHHHHHHHH!!!!
I just have so many ideas and thoughts and story lines and questions and things in general rushing through my head and I don't know which one to grab first and focus on, I don't know what's worth paying attention to and what's worth pushing to the back for a bit, and it's driving me crazy!!!! I can't focus on everything at once but since I can't decide what to focus on, it seems as if I'll focus on nothing instead.
I keep telling myself that I need motivation, but that's not true, I have TONS of motivation, I just need like an organizer for my thoughts. And I need to just pick something, do it and check it off my list, although a lot of the things on the list are things that I either can't do by myself, or will take a lot of time to set up and execute, like my theatre thing that I want to happen this summer. I know I can make it work, but I don't know where to start to make it work, it's all just so frustrating!! GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!
SO MUCH VENTING OF ANGST!!!!!!! BLEGH!
I feel better after venting, maybe now I will be able to actually get something done!!!!! Who knows. I guess I'll start with that assignment, although he may not be willing to accept it now. Here's to hoping.
